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All posts for the month July, 2016

Mark and his old college friend Mary Beth, up in Castiglione looking over the Tuscan hills

Mark and his old college friend Mary Beth, up in Castiglione looking over the Tuscan hills

There are a bunch of places called “Castelnuovo” – New Castle – in Italy. This particular Castelnuovo is in upper Tuscany and, in particular, in the Garfagnana area; thus the mouthful of a name. We came here to visit Mary Beth, an old friend of Mark’s from his college days, who was here for a week or so while her 12-year-old son Luca was participating in a prestigious music festival.

The "lobby" of our B&B in Castelnuovo. Breakfast was served outside on the patio, but you'd walk through this space to get to the buffet. And when you walked in, there was soft opera music playing. Sweet!

The “lobby” of our B&B in Castelnuovo. Breakfast was served outside on the patio, but you’d walk through this space to get to the buffet. And when you walked in, there was soft opera music playing. Sweet!

If you’ve ever fantasized about a few days in a Tuscan villa, surrounded by glorious green hills and fabulous food, this was it. Just beautiful. Mary Beth and her family – husband Sven, son Luca, and daughters Isabella, Zoe, and Fiona – had rented an apartment in the neighboring village of Castiglione de Garfagnana while we stayed at Villa Bertagni, a B&B about a mile from the center of Castelnuovo. Set on at least several acres, the proprietors had renovated an old villa and then added a building or two for the six guest rooms. Breakfast was heaven on a terrace, while the two (TWO!) swimming pools were a welcome relief from the mid-day heat. Morning runs along the Serchio River were beautiful.

The highlight, though, was the evening we went up to Castiglione, where Mary Beth, et al., were staying. Castiglione is a tiny town, way up a hill overlooking Castelnuovo, so the first stop was a little bar/cafe with a deck looking over the whole valley. Wine, Aperol, munchies. Amazing. You just sat there and kept gazing out over … Tuscany.

The view of Castelnuovo from Castiglione

The view of Castelnuovo from Castiglione

But then, though it seemed it couldn’t, it got better. We’d reserved a table for eight at what was probably the only restaurant in town and there we sat having one of the great meals of my life. To be sure, not everything about the meal was perfect; for one thing, the house wine was a strike against my theory that you can’t get bad wine in Italy. One dish, though, shared by all of us, was historic. The fresh spaghetti with pesto was simply perfect. I know, it doesn’t sound like much; anyone can make spaghetti with pesto, right? (NB: Yes, Mark & I usually avoid carb-heavy pasta. We make exceptions, though, and this was the right time for an exception.)

Ah, but this was special. The spaghetti was truly al dente, slightly resistant to being bit. And the pesto. We all agreed, if any of us had made it we would have put twice as much pesto in, but this dish not only didn’t need it, it didn’t want it. Something about 2,000 years or so of practice and these Italians have something figured out about cooking. And then, when it’s all over, the owner/cook/waiter just puts a bottle of vin santo, sweet wine, on the table along with biscotti, the traditional Tuscan dessert.

Counterclockwise from the left that's Sven, me, Zoe, Luca, Fiona, Isabella, Mary Beth, and Mark. Honestly one of the great meals of all time.

Counterclockwise from the left that’s Sven, me, Zoe, Luca, Fiona, Isabella, Mary Beth, and Mark. Honestly one of the great meals of all time.

Life doesn’t get better than that.

A classic Mark selfie with Mary Beth, Luca, and Isabella

A classic Mark selfie with Mary Beth, Luca, and Isabella

And a word about our friends. Total fun, and fascinating people. Twelve-year-old Luca is apparently quite the prodigy; he was the youngest participant in the festival and had recently performed with no less than Philip Glass. On top of that, he was just a great kid, defined in part, of course, by laughing at all my jokes. Even after making a mistake during a key performance in the competition he was miserable for a while but then bounced back like a pro. His sisters, too, all fun to be around.

While in Duluth we hadn’t really focused on where we’d go after Castelnuovo and by now, at the height of tourist season, it was pretty hard to find lodging we liked in other parts of Tuscany. So instead we’re hightailing it across the peninsula to Ravenna, near the Adriatic, and figure out how we spend the next couple weeks in Italy.

Food was a big part of the attraction. Here Mark & I are at lunch with Mary Beth.

Food was a big part of the attraction. Here Mark & I are at lunch with Mary Beth.

Here I am with that fabulous spaghetti and pesto. What I really love about this picture, though, is Luca off to the side roaring in laughter. He was always laughing and that look is exactly how I'll remember him.

Here I am with that fabulous spaghetti and pesto. What I really love about this picture, though, is Luca off to the side roaring in laughter. He was always laughing and that look is exactly how I’ll remember him.

Mary Beth Palmer-Gierlinger

Mary Beth Palmer-Gierlinger

Our view from breakfast at Villa Bertagni

Our view from breakfast at Villa Bertagni

And finally, the pool - or, I should say, one of the two pools. Our hosts encouraged us to invite our friends over, so the kids kind of liked it.

And finally, the pool – or, I should say, one of the two pools. Our hosts encouraged us to invite our friends over, so the kids kind of liked it.

My five siblings and me with Mom after the funeral. Mom wasn't really into the black thing. And as for my Dad, you can tell you've lived a long life when your four sons are all pretty much bald.

My five siblings and me with Mom after the funeral. Mom wasn’t really into the black thing. And as for my Dad, you can tell you’ve lived a long life when your four sons are all pretty much bald.

Going home for my Dad’s funeral was obviously a sad experience but I was surprised that it was also a beautiful experience. It was wonderful and truly comforting to spend a week with my family: five siblings (most of whom I’m very fond of), my grieving Mom, and a BIG extended family. I introduced Mark to an old high school classmate who was also my fifth cousin, which is probably the best example of what an extended family really means. Lots of my own first cousins as well as well as a few remaining aunts and uncles, and some of my own nieces and nephews. Really not much more to add except how comforting it was to share it all with my brothers and sisters and their families.

Me & Dex, the cancer survivor, with his brother Mat looking on

Me & Dex, the cancer survivor, with his brother Mat looking on

Beyond that there was also a couple of opportunities to genuinely celebrate. One of my great-nephews – my older brother’s grandson – had been diagnosed with a rare and aggressive cancer almost two years ago; he was given just a 20 percent chance of survival. But survive he did and in fact got a clean bill of health from an MRI scan while we were there and then got his final “port” removed (basically a tube into his chest so they could administer drugs without hooking him up anew every time). So we lost my 83-year-old father but gained a cancer-free nine-year-old at the same time. My Dad would have been the first to approve of that trade.

And then I learned that another of my relatives, a smart and charming 12-year-old, had just recently come out. I spent some time talking with him about his experience and the response at school and could just really celebrate the progress we’ve made. It was inconceivable that a 12-year-old could have come out when I was in school – I’m sure they’d have sent him to electro-shock therapy or something like that – but now it’s pretty much OK and increasingly normal. He’s happy, comfortable, and reasonably well accepted. I told him about the “It Gets Better” website, built to help LGBT teenagers experiencing harassment, except apparently it’s already good; there’s not much needed for him at least in terms of getting better. That makes me very, very happy.

So yes, my Dad’s death and the funeral were sad. Very sad. But it was also a week to celebrate family and some other good things in life. But after a week at home it’s time to go back to Italy and resume our previously scheduled programming. Next stop, Tuscany.

My brother Al, Mark, me, and Mark's sister Jeanne, with Duluth's iconic Aerial Lift Bridge behind us

My brother Al, Mark, me, and Mark’s sister Jeanne, with Duluth’s iconic Aerial Lift Bridge behind us

My cousin Janet, who sang at Dad's funeral, with his cousin Elaine

My cousin Janet, who sang at Dad’s funeral, with his cousin Elaine

A highlight for me and Mark was the day after the funeral when we ended up taking Mat & Dex to a carnival

A highlight for me and Mark was the day after the funeral when we ended up taking Mat & Dex to a carnival

Mark & Dex on a ride with little Tori, a friend of the family who has pretty much become family

Mark & Dex on a ride with little Tori, a friend of the family who has pretty much become family

A day or two after the funeral most of us went hiking on part of the Superior Hiking Trail overlooking Lake Superior and St. Louis Bay. Here I am with Al's wife Anita.

A day or two after the funeral most of us went hiking on part of the Superior Hiking Trail overlooking Lake Superior and St. Louis Bay. Here I am with Al’s wife Anita.

Mark & my sister-in-law Karen on the trail

Mark & my sister-in-law Karen on the trail

After dinner our last night in Duluth at my brother Vic's house we went into the backyard for a fire and s'mores. Here's Vic with Dex & Mark.

After dinner our last night in Duluth at my brother Vic’s house we went into the backyard for a fire and s’mores. Here’s Vic with Dex & Mark.

The gardens of the Villa Melzi D'Eril, built in the early 19th century for one of Napoleon's lieutenants, just part of the beauty of Bellagio

The gardens of the Villa Melzi D’Eril, built in the early 19th century for one of Napoleon’s lieutenants, just part of the beauty of Bellagio

The plan was two days in Milan followed by 10 days in Bellagio, on Lake Como, with my brother and his wife. The reality was two days in Milan, one night with my brother and his wife at a great condo in Bellagio with a little balcony and a great view over the lake. And then a call over breakfast that our 83-year-old father had died suddenly the night before. Thus we spent much of the day making arrangements to get back to Minnesota and left early the following morning.

Still, since this is really my record of our travels, I wanted to post the pictures of Milan and Bellagio even though I wasn’t in a mood to write much. Milan is a great city that we really don’t have figured out at all, while Bellagio is a beautiful town that I’ve wanted to get to since I first read about it while living in Naples in the mid-1970s. We ended up with two nights and one full day before returning home.

As for my brother and his wife? They had just flown in to and then turned around and flew back. We call it their day trip to Italy.

My brother Al and his wife Anita. They'd dropped their kids for a Spanish language immersion camp before coming over for what was supposed to be a child-free 10-day holiday. Alas, it was not to be.

My brother Al and his wife Anita. They’d dropped their kids for a Spanish language immersion camp before coming over for what was supposed to be a child-free 10-day holiday. Alas, it was not to be.

Lake Como, with the town of Bellagio there on that spit of land where the lake splits in two. I actually got this picture on the flight from Copenhagen to Milan, a couple days before we drove up there. Made me pretty excited to see the place close up.

Lake Como, with the town of Bellagio there on that spit of land where the lake splits in two. I actually got this picture on the flight from Copenhagen to Milan, a couple days before we drove up there. Made me pretty excited to see the place close up.

A tree, a lawn, a lake, some mountains, and a Kindle. Can it get any better?

A tree, a lawn, a lake, some mountains, and a Kindle. Can it get any better?

Before Bellagio there was two days in Milan. Here's Mark in the Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II.

Before Bellagio there was two days in Milan. Here’s Mark in the Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II.

The main altar in the Church of San Maurizio, a hidden gem in Milan. First we tried to go to Poldi Pezzoli Museum, what was once the private collection of a wealthy patron housed in his palace. It was closed. Then we tried to go see the Last Supper, but you need tickets for that weeks in advance. This one, though, we just stumbled on, and it was spectacular, absolutely covered in early 16th century frescoes.

The main altar in the Church of San Maurizio, a hidden gem in Milan. First we tried to go to Poldi Pezzoli Museum, what was once the private collection of a wealthy patron housed in his palace. It was closed. Then we tried to go see the Last Supper, but you need tickets for that weeks in advance. This one, though, we just stumbled on, and it was spectacular, absolutely covered in early 16th century frescoes.

Here's a blissful Santa Lucia holding her lost eyes, making it look so easy

Here’s a blissful Santa Lucia holding her lost eyes, making it look so easy

And a blissful Santa Agata carrying her severed breasts on a platter. Did torture and martyrdom ever look so comfortable?

And a blissful Santa Agata carrying her severed breasts on a platter. Did torture and martyrdom ever look so comfortable?

What convent would be complete without crucifix frescoes? This one seems to have gotten the story just a little off, though, as the noose behind Jesus indicates.

What convent would be complete without crucifix frescoes? This one seems to have gotten the story just a little off, though, as the noose behind Jesus indicates.

And then one last view of Lake Como. We'll get back some day.

And then one last view of Lake Como. We’ll get back some day.